recovery.

so yesterday was a bit of a pity party day. i opted not to blog because i figured who needs to be invited to my pity party. and there are so many more tragic things in the world, that i am just foolish for feeling sorry for myself. my sweet husband sensed my pathetic state and slapped me upside the head with some psalms and i quickly got over myself! ;)

so today is a new day. recovery is a lot slower than i anticipated. i am still quite sore, but i can recognize that things are getting easier. i can get in and out of bed and up and down out of chairs a lot better than i did a day after surgery. i think the hardest part for me is not the pain but the lack of doing. i have a pretty high pain tolerance and surgery seriously is a breeze compared to the pain i had when i went to the ER. i like to be busy and just sitting around for 7 days now is really starting to get old. but maybe this is a lesson that the Lord is trying to teach me.

today i am thankful for:
1. a good night's rest. i am able to sleep on my left side now (still not my right) and i sleep best on my side so that is good.
2. i can take showers. i love taking showers.
3. i do see an improvement, even if it's not the improvement i had anticipated.
4. friends! a friend is picking up burrito from school this week, we still have meals coming, i get at least an email a day that totally blows my socks off, another friend is picking up noodle for bible study tomorrow....thank you friends!
5. i am off pain meds as of today and i still feel okay. the pain meds honestly make me feel worse than the pain.

things to pray for:
1. i am fighting some congestion and a cough....a cough is so NOT a good thing right now.
2. i ran a low grade fever yesterday...hoping that is normal and i don't think i have one today.
3. one of my incisions began bleeding this morning. it has since stopped, and i've got a call in to the doctor about it.
4. finding joy in all things...i admit my weakness here. it's hard to find joy in an ugly, hacked up, swollen and discolored abdomen. but i am trying.
5. mommy guilt. i am not the normal mommy that i usually am, and i feel guilty for the burden it has placed on my family.